The blog where I rant about things that should be obvious to everyone

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Automatic Social Proof

The idea of social proof is that someone can be in a state where their actions are generally considered to be correct or good. The way their behaviour is evaluated is not by actually weighing their individual actions. Their actions are considered good because of who is doing them. The person doing them has social proof so therefore whatever they do is viewed in a positive light.

Normally getting social proof is a process. You can do it somewhat quickly by working a room. Make sure that people see you interacting with other people where you're all smiling and laughing and they'll think that you are a fun guy, and therefore whatever you do must be fun. After all, you're a fun guy. A good wing man can help with this as well, as they can, with their interactions, show you both respect and amusement.

However, there are some situations where you can have pretty strong social proof simply by being alive. The best example of this happened to me while I was in college. The dorms were set up so that you always had people from all grades there. It was not like some colleges that have the freshman dorm and the sophomore dorm and so on. For us everyone was mixed in together, so every year you had a batch of seniors and juniors who would either graduate or move to an apartment, and you had a new group of freshmen coming in. And every year the upper class students had pretty near 100% social proof when interacting with the freshmen for 1 whole semester. After that time they'd start to figure things out and those of them who where more socially savvy would get a place in the social hierarchy that was higher than many of the upper class. But for that first semester the sophomores, juniors, and seniors could do no wrong in the freshman’s eyes.

It was remarkable because some of the most socially inept people I have ever met, I met in college. I knew guys with such a bad sense of humour that no joke, no matter how funny, would be amusing when they told it. And on top of that the jokes that they told were terrible. But for that first semester, they could send the frosh rolling in the isles. The reason for this is that most of the students came from out of state and generally didn't know anyone, so they would be pretty desperate for acceptance and approval. So if some one told a bad joke, they'd laugh. If someone made an absurd, stupid statement they would accept it as wise. And of course upper class men dating the incoming freshmen was so common it was a cliche. Then that magic semester would wear off (and by magic I mean that the normal rules did not apply, the frosh were actually annoying as hell before they stopped all the damn approval seeking) and things would get back to normal.

So if you are trying to start using game and improve your sociosexual rank, it couldn't hurt to seek these situations out. Go places were your approval automatically means more than other people's, ride the wave, and see if when everything levels out if you can stay on top. Staying on top is much easier than climbing there.


  1. Good idea, but where do you find a place like this besides college?

  2. It's not going to be as extreme other places, but most any smaller community that gets new comers will be like this to some extent. The factors are the size of the group, and the amount of investment that a person puts into being accepted. So after you've graduated your mostly going to looking at work situations if your wanting anything close to as big a boost. But if you join a club that has new comers, you'll notice the same effect with them, it just won't be as extreme or last as long.